Here’s to another week of grinding, hustling and just plain old working hard. I want to talk about ‘’standing in our own way’’ and by standing in your own way I mean, doubting yourself, talking yourself out of a brilliant idea and being too scared to post that picture or voice your opinion because you are scared and worried about what others are going to say.
If you are feeling like you are constantly standing in your own way and always doubting yourself then this post is for you.
Learn to love yourself.
The reason I wanted to start this post with the first part being ‘’Learn to love yourself” is because without self-love, believing in yourself, what you are capable of, you will always struggle with moving forward, creating a life that you have been dreaming of, facing those fears and accomplishing those goals.
We often spend so much time second-guessing ourselves, wondering what others are going to think about what we are doing or we feel like we aren’t smart enough, intelligent enough or capable of accomplishing the very thing we want to accomplish. Well, this is your quick reminder or let’s call it a defining moment! ‘’You can accomplish anything and everything’’ especially if you believe in yourself and learn to love yourself completely.
We always look for love from those around us. A boyfriend, a partner, a friend and while getting love and feeling that love from those around us is important, it’s even more important for us to love ourselves. You are your best critic, you are your best friend, and you are the person that knows you best. So why not love everything you are and everything you have to offer.
Today or this evening, or whenever it is convenient for you, I want you to take 10 minutes, grab a pen and paper and write one thing you love about yourself. Just start with writing down one thing. Tomorrow I want you to write down 2 things you love about yourself. Start making this a habit. Start your morning or end your day with writing what you love about yourself and read over these daily. Especially when you aren’t feeling that lovable. Remind yourself how valuable you are and how important you are. Take some time to actually recognize everything you are, be thankful and excited because I can guarantee you that only great things can come from here. You have already taken the first step!
Think about yourself as a business.
If you where running your own business, I can guarantee that you would be checking in on it every day, checking your bank account, making sure everything is running smoothly and doing everything in your power to make sure your business is progressing and moving in the direction you want it to go, so why don’t you do that with yourself? Treat yourself the way you would treat your business or if you had a business. Check-in on yourself daily and if you find yourself running out of steam and needing some time out then give yourself that time. Take the time to replenish your soul, your well-being and your vibe.
Do what is best for you and never feel guilty for that. I know so many women and this includes myself have a strict schedule of gym, working a full-time job, working on their side hustle and so much more and the moment you start thinking about taking a day off or skipping the gym, this immense amount of guilt and disappointment sets in and what do you find yourself doing? Pushing yourself even harder when you should actually be taking some time to revive your mind, soul, and vibe.
I totally get that we are living in a world where if you aren’t continuously busy you feel as if you are going to end up a step behind the next person or you aren’t going to be as successful, well frankly screw that. No harm has ever come from a bit of TLC so it’s about time you gave yourself some and don’t feel bad about it.
Be the person you need and know that’s enough.
You are enough! The person you are is enough! We are all in relationships. We have partners, we have friends, we have companions but one thing you need to remember is that you are enough. You don’t need someone to complete you, validate you or tell you that you are good enough. You need to be the person you need. Whatever you aren’t getting from that partner or friendship you need to be that for yourself. I love my husband and he means the absolute world to me but I stand by my word that I know I am enough. I don’t need my husband to complete me or validate me. In fact, he adds to me. He brings something extra into my world and it makes everything brighter but if I didn’t have him there I would still be able to go on because I as a person is enough. I never want to put my happiness in another person’s hands and I never want to be responsible for another person’s happiness and neither should you.
As I said before, you are your own best friend and you need to continue to be your own best friend. You need to love yourself enough to know that you are enough, your happiness is important, you are capable of absolutely anything you put your mind to and nothing is impossible unless you, yourself say it’s impossible. You say what goes in your life and one thing you need to remember is ‘’you are enough”.
Your past doesn’t define you.
Say it with me ‘’Your past does not define you’’. We have all been through tough times and dealt with life-changing experiences that we find hard to forget and forgive but one thing you need to remember is what you have been through in the past does not define your future. Try and use those hard times that you have been through as fuel to totally smash your goals and work towards creating the best future for yourself.
People that know you and know your past may put doubts in your mind. You might doubt yourself because you feel like you are defined by what you have been through but that does not define you, the person you are, the person you are becoming or your future. You determine who you are, who you want to be and what future you want for yourself. Take a moment to think back to a time you never thought you would be able to move past. Take a moment to look at where you are now and how far you have come. You have completely killed it. If anything, you are 10 times stronger because of what you have been through. Just think back to a time you never thought you would be able to get past but here you are. You overcame it and you are stronger for it. That just shows how strong you are.
Stop with the ‘’what if’s and second-guesses’’.
Let’s all take a moment and stop second-guessing ourselves, our decisions, the job we are in now and basically everything else. We spend so much time thinking about what could have been when we could actually be using that valuable time working towards the goals we have now. I totally get that it is so easy to sit back and think about how things could have been different if we decided to take a different path but if we constantly harp on what could have been, we aren’t going to progress further than where we are now. We will end up stuck if we constantly think about what could have been. Instead of using valuable time second-guessing you could be using that time to smash out your goals which will bring you closer to the life you are wanting for yourself. I am a big believer of ‘’the universe has a plan’’ and sometimes one door is meant to close so a million others can open. We just have to wait for the right time, grind on a daily basis and everything will eventually come together.